take pride in sending our children to the best school and we are prouder
parents if we are driving our children for sports, arts, music and other
activities. We leave no stone unturned in exalting the achievements of our children
every chance we get. On the other hand we do not hesitate much to reprimand and
demean them when the children do not show much to exalt about.
lasting happiness, it is important to succeed” that’s what we have been taught
to believe. I do not deny it either. However my contention is on the definition
of ‘success’ that we have been given. I say ‘we have been given’ because that
is the way precisely it is. We have hardly formed any definitions of our own
since the day we came to this earth. Our surrounding, including our parents,
relatives, teachers, friends, acquaintances and even systems, have their own
definitions about everything and anything which they have collected from their
surroundings in turn. Every time we interact with our surroundings we get
impressed by their definitions of life. These impressions have tremendous
influence on formation of our definitions and concepts and ideas and values and
principles. This is how our concept of ‘success’ has also come to us.
definition of success says- You are successful when you have good enough amount
of Education, Money, Assets, Recognition and Status. Consequently, when you do
not have any of these, you are not successful. Beginning our life with this
definition, we set on a wild goose trail for the rest of our life. We educate
ourselves, run in the race for promotions and learn some more and run some more
and learn some more… every time believing that happiness would be waiting for
us round the next corner.. and we keep running… do you see the fallacy here? We
are on the path of success and though we have a few accomplishments on the way,
the ultimate ‘success’ that is supposed to give us that mythical ‘Happiness’
keeps eluding us. You see those who set the definitions for us have conveniently
skipped the part of telling us what is “Good enough”… I am sure they did not
know it either and are on a blind trail themselves.
what we have acquired is wealth, degrees, assets and position and the
‘happiness’ that we had set in search off is still eluding us. You might argue
in favor of the time you got your first degree, your envious job, the first
salary, the dream house, the shining new car…. They sure were occasions for
celebrating, and we celebrate in happiness. Well, for a moment, let’s suppose
that your argument is valid, then I have a question for you, If these things
are the source of your ‘happiness’ then how long did your happiness last each
time? When you had relationship trouble the next time, did the memory of your
new car or the pay cheque keep you happy and contented? The next times when
things did not go through according to your plans, did the walls of your house
make you feel secure and satisfied?
questions are for you to answer for yourself, because I know my answers. But if
your answers are similar to mine I think it’s time you need to understand the
difference between ‘pleasure’ and ‘happiness’. What we have been experiencing
till now, the excitement and adrenaline rush on our possessions and
achievements, is in fact only ‘Pleasure’ which come to us from the stimulation
of our sense organs- The organs that give us the feeling of ‘good’ when they
come in contact with external attractions. It is a lovely feeling indeed, a
very much wanted feeling and being in the human form we deserve it too. But it
is still not the same as ‘lasting happiness, it is temporary, fleeting and
conditional. And these three words would take us to understand real lasting
happiness that is called as “Bliss”.
or TRUE HAPPINESS is thus a continuous phenomenon, it is here to stay and it is
non- conditional. The feeling of happiness that stays with us as a feeling of
contentedness and peace, in spite of the challenges of life is called as
“Bliss”. Further, the absence of pleasures brings you sadness, but the bliss is
just there, and hence there is no opposite of bliss, even though we may stop to
deal with the challenges of life on the way.
this term has been associated more with saints and spiritual pursuers for long.
In fact, “renunciation” of the worldly pleasures has been put as a condition to
gain “bliss’. And thus the most important need of every human being has been
made into a “treasure meant to be out of reach for most and deserved by a
handful that are ready for renunciation”.
here is the good news, you and I are equally eligible for this nectar of bliss
and believe me it is worth every bit it takes. We are here on this earth for
taking our lessons and lessons have to come through pain, so challenges cannot
be missed by anyone. However that does not mean that we have to live this life
wallowing in pain and misery. We have a choice, the choice to experience the
bliss that is our inherent nature in spite of the challenges.
will ask how is it possible in this world full of misery. The answer is right
there with you, deep inside you is where your bliss resides. The need is only
to remove the layers and layers of coverings of ignorance and acquired
definitions about our true self and to connect to our real self. It is a matter
it very difficult? Well, again it has been made for us to believe that the
achievement of self is possible for only a few. Trust me, YOU CAN. It is just a
matter of believing that we are a divine soul in human form. Of course there
are the counselors to help us to
cross the material barriers that stop us form crossing over. Some of us need a guiding hand to lead us
gently to our core, but the basic requirements are simple- faith and patience
to embrace your-self. The moment you can know the real you, love that person,
other things would cease to bother you as much.
is beautiful and simple. We have made it too complicated. Even with its
challenges it does not have to be that. You have issues? Connect to your
internet and look for a counselor near you or online counseling service. Happiness is waiting right around the